Virginity: is it worth it?

We live in a Nike world—a "just do it" society, to borrow the advertising slogan. This phrase has become part of everyday language for many Americans. And, in some cases, it is good advice.
For example, instead of getting overly uptight about whether a school report will be perfect and procrastinating about getting it started—just do it. Write the report and be finished with the project. Or instead of complaining about some chore around the house that you don't particularly like—just do it. The job will be finished that much sooner, and you can go about whatever else you want to do.
But is "just do it" good advice in all cases? Consider the matter of sex. Much of the entertainment media in the Western world implies or plainly tells us that sex is for everyone, at any time. Movies and television shows usually depict illicit sex between unmarried people as common or expected.
The lyrics of many modern songs carry the same message. For example the number two song on iTunes “Love in the Club”. Excerpts from lyrics: I wanna make love in the club, On the couch, on the table, in the club, in this club. Let’s both get undressed right here, Imma give it to ya non-stop. Sex sells, and the message is that having sex with anyone you love—or think you love—is perfectly acceptable. The idea that sex should be reserved for marriage is looked down on as an outdated notion held by religious people who are missing out on something good. The slogan seems to be "just do it" when you want and don't worry about whether or not you are married.
If you listen to the entertainment world, you might also get the impression that everyone is "doing it." After all, Hollywood producers often say they are only mimicking true life. And all too often young people fall for that lie. They can begin to feel embarrassed by not being experienced sexually—by being a virgin.
Word meanings change
It's funny sometimes how fluid the English language is. Words take on different connotations over time, depending on the prevailing actions and attitudes of the day.
The word virgin has experienced that shift. The Random House Unabridged Dictionary says virgin means a person who has never had sexual intercourse. It also lists many other meanings for the word—including pure, first, not exploited or not previously used. These all have the connotation of something that is beautiful and of the highest quality. Yet society often views being a virgin in the area of sex as out of date or bad. How ironic!
Why restrict sex?
However, there are other aspects of the negative consequences that are perhaps more visible or noticeable. In the United States, the "free love" approach began in earnest during the 1960s. What has been the fruit of some 40 years of promiscuity?
Divorces have skyrocketed to the point that there is a divorce for every two new marriages, and sexually transmissible diseases (STDs) have run rampant. The consequences of STDs range from irritation, embarrassment, sterility and lifelong pain to death, especially in the case of AIDS.
Teens' shifting attitudes toward sex
Apparently the warning message is starting to get through to more young people today. The CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) released a report in September 2002 that indicates more young people are saying, "let's not" when it comes to matters of sex.
It notes that between 1991 and 2001, the number of high school students who say they have never had sexual intercourse increased by 8.5 percent. The same report shows that well over half (54.4 percent) of all high school students have never had sexual intercourse. They have rejected the "just do it" mantra and the percentage tells us there are more virgins than nonvirgins. Perhaps young people are realizing that being a virgin means there are fewer emotional heartaches as well as freedom from worry about STDs. Sex creates a strong emotional bond. If that bond is created with someone other than a spouse, the odds are extremely high that at some point it will be broken—resulting in deep emotional pain and suffering.
It's interesting that the same report says that 67 percent of high school students are not currently sexually active. That means some have had sex in the past, but are no longer sexually active. There are obviously many young people who have made mistakes in the area of sex, but have stopped. Sometimes after making a mistake in this area people get discouraged or even depressed.
It is easy for them to reason that since they cannot turn back the clock, they may as well just keep on being sexually active.
Remaining a virgin has wonderful blessings—physical, emotional and spiritual. Perhaps it's time we shifted the meaning of that word back toward something that is beautiful and of the highest quality.
Entering marriage as a virgin shows that a person has chosen to remain pure and unexploited for his or her future mate. And if someone has already made a mistake in this area, "second virginity" will bring blessings from that point forward. The past cannot be undone, but there will not be any additional negative consequences. Virginity is worth it. Don't let anyone deceive you into thinking it is not—or that "everyone" is having sex. Don't be fooled by movies or soap operas. Married people, true to their partners, are the ones who really experience the intimate joys of the gift of sex.